All the Old Testament selections cited below come from the King James version of
the Bible. This translation can be cryptic at times to the modern reader—when the
King James version talks about a plague of emerods' (1 Samuel 5:9), it is referring
to hemorrhoids, medically defined as livid, painful, bleeding lesions about the
anus,' and when the King James version talks of paramours, whose flesh is as the
flesh of asses, and whose issue is like the issue of horses' (Ezekiel 23:20), the text is
referring to enormous penises and abundant seminal fluid—but at other times the
translation is charming in its clarity. Thus, in the King James version, the reader may
find this unbowdlerized passage in II Kings 18:27:
Hath he not sent me to the men which sit on the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?
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